our friendly little snowman
Another new year makes an appearance and I am thoroughly enjoying it with a bowl of fresh, homemade guacamole. It's not as awesome as it sounds, though, since I am doing so from my hidey spot in my office, so as to get the guacamole to myself. Once Owen catches on to the fact that I have this, it will be inhaled in one breath! So, I am hunched over and acting like nothing much is happening anytime someone walks through my office. Glamorous.
So far, my five waking hours of 2013 have involved a lot of time ogling DIY crafts on
Pinterest (oh, how I love thee, Pinterest!) and applying my favorite moisturizing facial mask. Pretty rough year so far. Skip & the boys are on Day 4 of the same Risk game... It's been a roller coaster of emotions. Skip is a pretty cutthroat player- even with the kids- yet they are holding their own, which pleases me. I would never be able to play that game without getting mad at Skip-- I just know it would be worse than when we play Scrabble!
this is getting serious
We had a great Christmas. The boys were again in the church pageant for the early family service on Christmas Eve. Owen was one of the three kings and Oscar was a shepherd. Rocco was scheduled to be a sheep, but got cold feet at the last minute. So, the shepherds has an invisible flock. It's always very spiritual to sit in the dim church and watch the kids recreating that special story. This year was no different, though I did find myself even more overcome with emotions than usual as we sat singing "Silent Night." My thoughts were flooded with those of my cousin Kyle. Which is nothing new, but it still catches me off guard sometimes. The church- especially Reverend Nancy- had really helped me get through losing him in 2011. Though I always found (and obviously still do) the hymns really open the floodgates for some reason. The nicer and more beautiful the song, the worse my crying. Back then, Rev. Nancy would often give me a reassuring look from the podium, as if to say, "You can do this. It's okay..." So glad to have had her there for me during that rough time; it was all very coincidental (?) that we even found ourselves at church at all that spring.
As you likely know, we are not even remotely religious in the going-to-church sense. However, because Skip's parents have been members there for years and it's where Skip attended church growing up, we would always go for the Christmas service. Sometimes Easter, too- but that was about it. And it was really more for his folks' benefit- or so we thought. We were total fair weather friends with the church. But that spring Owen was working toward his God & Family achievement for Scouts. It involved meeting one-on-one with Rev. Nancy for an hour or so... every week for about 2 months. Since we live about 50 minutes away from the church, it was just as easy to attend services and then help out around the church while we waited for Owen and Rev. Nancy to finish their meeting afterwards. It was during this period of time that we lost Kyle and I happened to find myself at church every weekend. I dreaded going to church because I knew I was going to lose it during service and it was so emotionally draining. And I did lose it- for many weeks on end. I would sit quietly sniffling... during the hymns, my voice would start cracking and wavering so that, eventually, my mouth was moving but no words would come out. I was a complete hot mess. However, through e-mails and in person, Rev. Nancy was always there and she really helped me keep it together. I can't say exactly how, because it was very smooth and quiet. It certainly wasn't through quoting scripture or anything "churchy" like that because I would have been completely turned off.
Well, Owen
did earn his special achievement for Scouts and we kept going to church most every Sunday that summer. A year+ later, we are back to our biannual attendance, mainly due to distance and gas prices, but we have a special connection to the church that we didn't have before. I know we all feel it... The kids have such a great relationship with Rev. Nancy, too. It just about overflowed our hearts when, at the end of this year's Christmas Eve service, Skip and I heard Rocco say "Merry Christmas, Reverend Nancy!" in his adorable 6-year-old voice...
Too. Cute. Our lives are full of many blessings... I just have to work some times more than others to not let them be overshadowed by our great losses. Always looking for ways to make it all matter, you know?
I think the new year will be a good one. My (champagne) glass is half-full. Has been for about a week, actually, since it feels like I have been on a steady drip of mimosas since Christmas Day. Being on break from school and also from work for the last two weeks has been pretty awesome. But it also means I need to have a lot more willpower to not be drinking champagne all day long, every day! ha Luckily, I'm not a huge Dom Perignon fan. I'll take a bottle of $9
Barefoot Bubbly Extra Dry over Dom any day. No joke.
Soon, we will have even more reason to celebrate... or perhaps quake in our boots. Not sure yet which... but, either way: Skip has a birthday in a couple weeks and then a few days later Owen will be a teenager! (yikes) Can he really be that old?? This is where I would normally insert a picture of him from 13 years ago, but due to my brand new computer I haven't migrated all the old pics over yet. *insert mental image of adorable, smiling baby boy here*
I don't promise to post again in January. I think we should aim for once a month, at best. Who knows, but let's not take things too fast here, okay? I will try to post as often as I think to, and not a bit more! I have started my new year with more meaningful goals, like refreshing my love for random acts of kindness... I hope the new year also brings
you many ways to find joy within yourself.
